Lockout Schmockout: What Will NFL Stars Be Up to Without Football (Satire)?

January 22, 2011   ·     ·   Jump to comments

As the 2010-11 NFL season comes to a close, fans across the globe are left to wonder, “What will become of our men of muscle next season?  
Will there even be a next season?
Will we be treated to 16, 18, or None-Teen games?  
Say, what in the hell is a lockout anyway?  
Sounds scary.  
Are NFL players going to be trapped in a roller rink or YMCA gymnasium somewhere, telling ghost stories and having Mountain Dew drinking contests till their mom’s pick them up the next morning?
Seriously, does my ass look fat in these jeans? 
Well, that’s a lot of wondering… 

While HTMS can’t answer all of these questions, it is safe to say that a) your ass looks HUGE in those jeans (which is fine by us), and 2) we’ll do our best, as journalists, to uncover some answers.  HTMS caught up with some of your favorite American footballers to find out what they would do in the event of a lockout ne...

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