Rob Gronkowski Is Hosting a ‘GRONK Party Cruise’ to Bahamas, May Never Come Back

July 7, 2015   ·     ·   Jump to comments

In late-breaking nautical news, the islands of the Bahamas will be forcibly invaded in 2016 when amicable thigh pirate Rob Gronkowski lands ashore with a cruise ship full of people too drunk to conjugate.
The New England Patriots tight end released a trailer for the event Tuesday (h/t UpRoxx's Christmas Ape). Titled "GRONK's Party Ship hosted by Rob Gronkowski and Family," the video shows exactly how any three-day cruise from Miami to the Bahamas put on by the Gronkowski family should go.
There will be music. There will be dancing. And house—so much house.
So far, it appears the cruise will feature musical guests Waka Flocka Flame and Sammy Adams along with whatever army of DJs the Gronkowski clan requires to get through a long weekend at sea.
I don't see the downside here, guys. I've thought about it a lot, and you can't really go wrong with a Bahamian Gronk cruise.

Even in the worst-case scenario—where the Thightanic strikes a r...

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